I am SO happy!

So... You may be asking why I am so incredibly happy. It's not because I am in a relationship, it's better! I now am the official owner of a beautiful laptop! MY VERY OWN LAPTOP!!! So stinking excited! I have ALWAYS wanted one... and we found a great deal on one I fell in love with when I saw it at the store and after getting one that didn't want to work for me, I have a replacement and it works fantastically! Finally something that is all mine, that I don't have to worry about taking back to my dad's school or that it may crash or that there are lines through the screen because my brother was using it and it is very old....

I am so incredibly grateful for what I did have. Really truly grateful. I appreciate that I had a computer to use when mine decided to die on me, and I was grateful for the laptop that was Daniels to use until I got one of my own. And now I have one!

So yay! I totally have a laptop that I love, and can't wait to get everything all set up and pictures on it and everything.

And with work slowing down, it's going to be nice. It's only slow for a few minutes, it's going to get insane next week. Spa week, and 50 dollar swedish massages... That's going to make my life just hard. For a bit... and then hopefully it will all slow down a bit more. I don't mind working so hard, but I do mind working on Sunday. I have had to work for the last 2 sundays, and it will be nice to have a sunday off.

Speaking of Sundays, I also am now the new Sunday School Gospel Doctrine teacher. Terrible but I told some girls in my ward that if it weren't for my Relief Society Teacher calling, I wouldn't be coming to the ward and would have gone to my home ward instead. That same day I was called to the Sunday School. I think that I need to go to my singles ward.... maybe.

Well, I should go to bed. I am VERY tired. I worked hard today, and with all the drama of the laptop it's just draining. So good night to everyone, hope you are all doing well.

It's been a long time.

SO I know it's been a while. I went to a YSA conference out here on Sunday, and it was reallly good. The speakers were great, I met a guy at the dance the night before and got his number... But he doesn't respond to texts very well. I don't want to be pushy, so I am going to wait for the weekend and see if anything. If not, than maybe a phone call.



The other thing I don't want to think about is someone that's talking to me online. He's a nice enough guy, but I am not interested in him romantically. We've been talking for about a month now, and I just don't like him THAT way, and he wants my number and e-mail... and I keep telling him what a great friend he is being to me. Guys don't get hints, but I don't want to hurt him. The one I am interested in isn't responding, the one that I am not interested in won't leave me alone. Story of my life, huh?



SO now I am sitting at my spa, trying to put both out of my head and waiting for the 1/2 hour facial turned HOUR to come out so I can do the half hour massage on her. Grr... I hate waiting. And then I don't have anyone else until 4:30 so yay! I'm not waiting forever, I need to get something to eat soon enough.... We'll see what happens. I will get on again later, just wanted to update everyone on what is going on.

Birthdays and Reflection.

Yesterday was my 27th Birthday, and wow what a day it was. I loved it. People may wonder how sitting home doing laundry may be wonderful, but it really was. I got to catch up on all my laundry that I had been putting off for about 2 weeks and had about 2 hampers full. I know, bad. It wasn't A LOT but it was just bulky. Sheets, some towels, jeans, stuff you don't really think about. So I got all that done, and finally tackled the spare room.

And I didn't just stay home, I was able to go to lunch with my mother. I love my mom. She is such a wonderful woman. She helped me to become whom I am today. Her and my father both made me a strong and independent woman, and I am so grateful to them. So we went to lunch, and I went back to her work and sat with her for another hour and talked to people in her office.

My brother moved to Utah about a week ago, and I was staying in the spare room. So I got to move into his room while the spare room is becoming the guest room. It's nice to be able to have a bed in there that I can make because it's not against the wall, and a window you can open because it has a screen on it. Laughs. It really wasn't that bad in the spare room, it got hot because it was on the outside of the house but that's about the only complaint I had. I slept in there, that was about all.

So after I came home, and my brother is watching a show that I just started and he paused it so I wouldn't get things ruined when I got to it.... I got to tackle what I had been putting off very well for the past few weeks, the spare room.

So I had to move my entire closet and dresser in the other room, as well as all my boxes and papers... and I am kind of a pack rat, pretty bad to be honest. So that was a feat. By the end of it I was just grabbing bags up off my floor and throwing stuff in them to get the room cleaned up, recycling bottles, and getting clothes all hung up. And it only took me about 45 minutes, so I was proud.

I know this sounds terrible. But it points out how wonderful I thought the day was. I had a fan, I had a room that was mine to set up how I wanted, I had the opportunity to get rid of all the stuff I was just holding onto without a reason, I was happy as a clam. So I got it all out, put most of it on my bed, and started to sort through my many storage boxes I hadn't touched in months. I got rid of 80 to 90 percent of the stuff in those boxes which I didn't need and if I did I could buy it again.

This was all while my mom was working, brother was watching a show, and dad was taking a nap. My brother-in-law and sister came over last night, and I was able to celebrate with the family. We had my favorite dinner, Swedish Meatballs with rice, watermelon, french bread, and peas. We got streamers put up in my bedroom and we got to spend time with the kids.

Poor Alex has a fever, so he was pretty tired and just didn't want to do much which isn't like him at all. I will admit I was a bit worried about him.

So we finally got to opening the gifts, and I LOVE my niece and nephews. They were so excited they wanted to help. I had Camden bring me the smallest of the gifts, which was a cool Willow Tree Figure. My mom has gotten me hooked now.

Ari brought me the next one, which turned out to be a throw blanket that is SO incredibly soft! And then Alex brought me the biggest one, the one I was SO excited to open. My GORGEOUS new comforter. It's fluffy, rich, and absolutely stunning. Ruby red, with gold filigree threads, and just beyond stunning. It came with the decorative pillows, and the pillow shams, so that made me very happy! I was going to put it on my bed, but Camden being so adorable... He grabbed the small square pillow, put it on the floor, lay his sweet head on it, and pull the comforter over himself like he was going to take a nap. Melt my heart right there and then.

SO it was pretty much the best birthday ever. I got to be with my family, got some amazing gifts, and am happy as a clam. I am 27 on the 27th.... So as far as Golden Birthdays go, I think it was pretty slamming!

So I know this is late to post, just had to wait until I was able to finish it! :D

Things aren't what you expected. EVER.

So I was able to take a week off work and go to Utah, WAHOO!! I haven't been there since I moved away, and some things didn't end as well as I would have liked to before I left. I was happy to try to mend some bridges, calm some people and just have fun. But things can't go like that at all can they?

I didn't have a car, and I REALLY wanted to see some people. So my BFF Kristi went ahead and helped me out. That did end up making things kind of awkward as some of the people I wanted to see were people she either didn't know, didn't like, or didn't want to see. Or all the above. We ended up spending almost every minute together, not what I had pictured of my vacation. It was great, I enjoyed seeing her but I wasn't expecting so much together time.

I did have some music on a friends computer, and wanted to get it off, but REALLY wanted to see her and see how she was doing. Things didn't end as good as I would have liked them to, and I hoped we could put it all behind us. I thought we had, and she was distracted as was I by trying to make sure my friend was all right, not too bored, trying to find "safe" topics of conversation we could all follow on. It actually turned out to be a very bad visit. It took almost the whole time there with me on her computer, eventually transfering everything to my iPod and worrying about it later. I did NOT want her to think I only came for her music, that was NOT my intention. Unfortunately it ended up being just that. She was upset, rightly so. And she was busy with her job and family and I felt like I was just in the way. So it wasn't what I expected.

Then today, I go to work, and have 7 massages to have to do. That's a lot by anyone's standards. I did them all, felt good about my work, and came home. Then I get a text from my boss that she just spent 45 minutes listening to someone complain about my massage. My last client, whom I busted my butt on. I listened to what she wanted, asked for feedback on the massage, and she seemed to fall asleep. She ended up reaming me to my boss about stuff that she NEVER TOLD ME to concentrate on. SO my boss is giving her to someone else to work on the next time we are open, and just wanted to let me know so we could talk about it on Tuesday.

I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!! You feel like you're in a principals office while they try to tell you how to do your job, when you are trained and qualified. And, oh ya, they HIRED you to do this job. Not everyone will like you. Not everyone will like your massage. That's expected. But because she is newly rich, she is freaked out that she may tell all her new rich friends like her all about this, and she is desperate to keep them all happy.

I don't care if you are rich or poor, white or black, male or female, high political ties in the community or a regular joe. I treat every single client the same. I don't kiss feet, I don't shine shoes, and I DON'T bow down because someone complains. If they have something to say, say it to my face. Don't wait until you are SURE I am gone, and then talk to my boss. I am the one that should know if you have a problem so I can work on it, not have to be scolded by someone who is NOT my parent. It really annoys me, can you tell?

SO after all this goes down, I get an e-mail dredging up things in the past, and a plea that we can work through it and renew a friendship. I was in shock. I didn't think our friendship was in jeopardy. Of course we had ups and downs, but so does everyone. Things ended badly, yes. But I had tried to make it for the best, and yes it is still hard to look this person in the eye and know what to talk to them about. Our lives are completely different. We are on different paths. It's like a panther asking a deer about their life. Completely different animals, situations, etc.

So all this comes at the end of a VERY long week and I have to ask that if ANYONE else feels jilted, hurt, betrayed, annoyed, angry, or anything else please put it in your back pocket and wait a while before you ask me to "work through it" because I have stuff to work through right now that may take a while. Like recovering from the shocking blows that were just landed tonight by my boss and by a friend.

Hopefully this too shall pass quickly. I can't do this much longer. I can't worry that anything I do or say is going to end up causing a fight, or by massaging someone and NOT reading their mind that I may be in jeopardy of having to PAY for the massage I just gave because the client was not happy. The life of a spa sucks. Never work in one if you can help it.

What a crazy wonderful day.

First of all, Daniel went through the Temple today. It was absolutely beautiful, the experience was amazing. I had a few questions, and thankfully they were answered. Laughs.

I admit that I am a little worried about getting married eventually, and I know it will happen someday but you just have to wonder when you aren't getting any prospects.

But enough about me, let's talk about the day. I went out shopping with my mom, and the crazy part was that we stopped and got a soda at the Target. We got home, and I threw my soda bottle in my target bag with my candy bar, and my iPod. Do you SEE where this is going?!?

So I get into my room, and throw the bag on my bed. For some reason I think I need to grab my iPod so I start to look for it, and I can't find it in my purse. I am starting to freak out when I remember that it is in my bag instead of my purse. So I grab my bag, and look in it. To my horror, the soda had OPENED and had spilled inside the bag, and my iPod was floating on top!!! Now the bag had only been lifted where it moved to that side for a moment, so I was hoping that nothing bad happened, but that didn't stop me from FREAKING out, grabbing it, flipping out all the liquid that was on it, and grabbing my hair dryer to dry out the iPod. It freaked out for a SECOND, so my heart was stopping.

But the thing is, that my iPod is fine. Thankfully. I was completely blessed that it is working fine. I played with it for a bit to make sure, and dried it out completely with the dryer. I hooked it up to the computer, and it's okay as well.

So today has been absolutely wonderful. My foot is swollen because of my shoes, but that was my fault, so I need to take it easy tonight. My mom will probably post more about Daniel, but I do have to say that it was amazing to be in the Temple with my whole family. That was just a dream come true for everyone. Absolutely wonderful.

Better go though, let you know if anything happens or changes soon!!! :D

Blessings Come in ALL Shapes and sizes...

While some things are appreciated, some are just a pain in the butt. I have had a bunch of work, and it really is making it hard for me to keep going on with my work. I am getting tired of it, and REALLY am looking forward to a night off. Well, really a day off.... I need to be able to go for another 3 days, and that is going to be hard. I have a full day tomorrow, probably going to be full on Saturday and Friday. It is only Wednesday right? Wow....
I am hopefully going to be able to get out of here in June for a week, and take a break. We'll see what happens.

Owie

This week has been SO hard. The woman I work with had to take a leave of absence for medical reasons. She will be gone for about a month.

So that means I get the PRIVILAGE of taking all the clients that she worked on as well as being the main therapist on staff. So... I have been working SO hard. My shoulder has been killing me for the past 2 days, and it won't seem to stop. It is really frustrating, because I can't really raise my arm past my shoulder without it hurting, and when you have to reach for something during a massage it makes it very difficult.

So... This week I have done 24 hours of work. I average about 15 hours in a given week if I am lucky.

Wow, I am tired now. So I am going to go take 3 advil, a large glass of water, and go to bed. I hurt. My feet hurt, my arm hurts, my head hurts, and my legs hurt. Not my hands, which is weird. You would think that they would, but they don't.

Blog Train coming soon to Sunshiny Daze Designs.

Hey everyone, I am going to be joining a blog train on May 1st! Meaning that there will be kits for digital scrapbooking to download. I will also be putting some freebies on my design blog, so please come check it out in the next few days! I'm very excited about this, and hopefully I will be able to join the Sweet Tarts Store in a few more months. I just started to design, so I didn't feel quite ready for the task. But I will be putting up some mini kits as freebies, and some overlays if everything works out the way I want it to so YOU can start designing if you would like.

So please check out my design blog, and pick up these freebies that I have worked so hard on.

AND if anyone has any ideas for any kits they want to see, or want something in particular let me know. I am ALWAYS looking for new ideas.

Sunshiny Daze Designs

Busy busy busy

Since my computer has been repaired, I need to be able to catch up on my digital kits. I haven't been working on them as hard as I need to, but I finally got 2 out of the 3 done that I need to, and now I need to make a preview for the kits.

I have been busy working, the spa is still inconsistent which is what is expected. It gets busy, and then it gets slow, so that's how it all goes. I am not complaining as long as I have some work. I don't like being idle. It drives me crazy.

I am trying hard to rejoin the singles in the area, but they are so young and it makes me feel so crazy. I don't like the fact that I feel like I am the mom looking after all the young ones, they are all just out of high school or just getting home from their missions... Crazy stuff.

It has been enough to keep me pretty busy, so I will try to update when I have more to say.

Moved

So I have officially MOVED back into my parents house. I had a TERRIBLE cold after I moved in, my poor family. It was bad, it made my breathing hard. I could barely talk because I couldn't breathe when I talked, so it was pretty scary. It seemed like I had pneumonia, or Bronchitis. It was pretty scary for me, I don't have insurance.
I went to bed that night, and got a fever. It was pretty bad, I lay in my bed and it was just like I was in an oven. I was burning up and not sweating. Lovely, huh? So we put on the humidifier, and my mom checked on me a few times. When I woke up the next morning, I had better breathing, thank goodness! And my fever was gone, so that was fabulous. I was still coughing, and it was just nice to be able to breathe. I got up and I had no energy whatsoever. I spent about a week in my house, in my room with the humidifier going and on my bed. I finally got my bed moved over once the wind died down, it was pretty bad. The winds were about 60 mph so we couldn't exactly get the trailer over to my sister's to get the bed.
My poor work, I had to take a week off and get over this cold. It was annoying because I never take time off work. EVER. But now, I have a cough that only comes when it wants to hack up a lung. It's lovely, but whatever it is or how long it's going to take to get rid of, I hope it doesn't affect my work. How much fun will it be to get a massage when the massage therapist is coughing all over you? Or can't breathe because she is coughing so hard? Laughs, that may be something the spa doesn't like.... But it would sure be a bunch of giggles and grins, right?

Moving day is almost here....

Yes, I know I haven't really put a lot on here lately and that is my fault. What is going on is I am moving in with my parents to allow my sister some more time with her family. I am pretty excited, but also sad to leave the kids and my sister. It's not lik I am going to Utah, but I am still moving, and that is hard.

I am having a harder time getting ready for this one because I don't really have boxes I am putting everything in like I normally do but it's not like I am going to move many states away, it's pretty close to my sister. The only thing I am going to have to do is get all my movies in a box. A lot of my stuff is already in the garage, so it will be nice to be able to finish up with what I have in the house right now.

So that's what I have been up to, I know thrilling right? It's not so bad but it's a lot of work to get all my stuff moved. Tomorrow is the big day... Hopefully everyone is ready for this.

What are people thinking?

Do people think I like to be reminded that I am single and that I need a man in my life? That I like to be told that I am not doing enough? That I am reminded constantly how I need to "Get a life" and stop hanging out with my family?

I KNOW that I am single, but that's something I have no control over. I don't know when anything is so that is why I don't go! I don't like my ward right now, something I need to work through and having someone push me isn't going to make it happen any faster.

I just don't know what people expect of me. They expect me to be this super amazing, single woman who is never home, always working and dating, always out with other single people. Well guess what? That's not me! I am not this super amazing woman who is always working and dating. I HAVE NO CONTROL OVER THAT!! PLEASE STOP WORRYING ABOUT ME!!!

AND PLEASE stop telling me to get a life. It really hurts. I just can't take it anymore. If people don't lay off, I will start fighting back. And that's not something I want to do.

FINALLY

My computer has been fixed. My brother is an angel, and so is my father. They helped me to get this all fixed, and really it was mostly my brother. My dad just gave me a new monitor, keyboard, mouse, and speakers. Love it!

So I have started creating again, and now I am working on some new kits. I have like 4 that I need to make, and hopefully I will be able to get some of them up on my other blog soon. YAY!!

SO the problems are ALMOST OVER!

Here is what has been going on, sadly I have to catch up a lot!!

So, the last time I posted was... A while ago. I have a season pass to Disneyland, YAY!! I got it when we went for Alex's Birthday! It was Fantastic to go and know that I can come back! So we went and I was able to see it through the eyes of a child which hasn't happened for a really long time. It was amazing to be so excited about everything. To see the characters, to see the rides and the shows, to see them all as if they were all real. He was so excited, he kept yelling out their names, and he picked where we went.

Then my best friend in Utah came down and stayed with me for 5 days. I was SO happy to have her come down, my mom came to the airport to pick her up with me. We got to go to Disneyland on Wednesday and go on the FAST rides. Surprisingly California Adventure had drained their lake and they were working on some new light show that is going to start next year in the spring and took out a few of the rides that are on the lake too.
We also went on Toy Story Mania, which by the way is SO much fun! And we then toured the Tortilla factory, and went over to Disney and spent the rest of the day there after lunch. We DID go to Build-A-Bear and built each other a stuffed animal and dressed them and all. (So my idea, I know, I am a nerd at times. But it was fun! And we have something nice!) I got a Snow White Bear, and she got a Belle Koala. VERY CUTE!

So we spent that time there, and I had to work sadly the rest of the time. But luckily we didn't have to spend ALL our time left at my job. We bought the Twilight Movie, we hung out, and laughed and talked just like old times. It really made me miss her. And then I took her to the airport on Sunday. It was SO hard to let her go back to Utah, because she is such a wonderful friend. But I did what I had to, and it was nice to have some time with my friend.

I have also helped my sister with sewing some clothes for her daughter. She is making 2 dresses, a skirt, and my mom made her some pajamas. My mother also made her a dress, so my niece will have 3 dresses when all is said and done. But the funny thing, the pajamas are HUGE on her. She is SO petite, and the pajamas are absolutely too big. It looks really funny, but she also looks VERY cute!

I am currently working with my brother on trying to get my computer to work, and getting my programs back on it for the designs I am doing, and getting the internet back on it so I can post more of what I am working on. I have a LOT Of stuff to do when I get the internet back, so my sister will not have to worry about me using her system any more. I AM SO grateful that she is letting me use her computer and internet.

Work is good, things are going well. I have regular clients now, and I have people referring which is always a pleasure. And I have a lot of headaches, but I am working on solving that as well. So all in all, it's a good life.

I am working on gettine more friends out here, I need to get more involved with the singles. I don't want to, really. They are VERY immature, and very annoying. But It's something I need to do, darn it. Just got to swallow my pride, open up, and say Hi. You never know, someone may be waiting for me just around the corner right?

My brother is amazing!

He got on my computer, and got my files off it! He is absolutely amazing! I can't believe he was able to do that for me. YAY!! So I am able to get a kit off that I worked SO hard on! YAY!! So happy about that! It will be up to show you soon, but I have to get some finishing touches on it.

So much has happened...

So I guess I should start with the MOST important one...

I KILLED MY COMPUTER!!! (Cries)

What happened is that I was working on some kits for the scrap booking thing, and it suddenly froze. It has been having problems with freezing lately, and programs not opening like it should, and so I thought it was just nothing. I thought I needed to restart it.

Well.... I held down the power button, and it went off. I pushed it again, thinking I had taken care of the problem to have a big, blue screen come up saying that Windows had an error and was stopped from running to protect my computer. I thought, hey no big deal. I had run a virus scan that same day, and nothing came up. SO I did what it said, and tried to run it in safe mode. Same problem. So I tried again, and tried again, and again, and again. Every time doing something different, trying to get it to come back up. And nothing worked!!!! I was so sad.

I called my dad, and he said to unplug it, and let it sit for a bit. So I did just that. And still, no dice. So I did everything that I could think of, and nothing. I called my uncle, couldn't get him on the phone. Called my dad again, and nothing.

So my brother got me in touch with a friend in Oregon whom is a computer genius. He heard the error, and knew EXACTLY what had happened. What happened is I CRASHED WINDOWS!!!

I crashed the OPERATING SYSTEM!!! The hard drive should be fine, but the operating system is scrapped. I have to get the recovery disk from my father to get it re-installed, and PRAY that everything is still on my computer. If anything else, I won't wipe the drive. I will take it out, and send it to my brother's friend to get everything off of it.

And it turns out, it wasn't my fault. It was something that can take 6 months or more to happen, and I got it from my family about 3 months ago. So that's not my fault! Laughs. But it is still something that happened to me, and still I don't have the portable hard drive that I need to back up all my files. My music is mostly off of it, but my pictures, that's what I want more than anything. And my videos. That would be nice to have on there too. Gosh, I just have the best of luck don't I?

SO this is my weekend. Besides being an EMOTIONAL WREAK and crying A LOT, having my computer die, and work not being as busy as I would like, it has been pretty uneventful!

I am typing this on my sister's computer, and so VERY grateful that she is letting me use it.

And my best friend from Utah is coming to visit me, I am so very excited! 1 week and 3 days until she is here!!! YAY!!!

Updates

`Sorry, I know it has been a while. So here is what I have been up to lately:

1) Work has been crazy! So many people want me to come in, so I have been living there lately. Fun huh?

2) I have another cold, I just got over one and it seems to have come back or another one piggy backed on the first one. Joy of Joys.

3) I have started digital designs for digital scrapbookers. I have a million and a half ideas for kits, the problem is getting them on the computer to look like what I have in my head. Sigh.

4) I have been trying to help my sister in the mornings. That means I get up at 7:30. I know, it's not that early to most people but to me it is!

5) I have been going to church, and had a breakthrough today. I was more myself, laughing and happy than I have been in a while. It felt really good. I think I shocked a LOT of people as to how open I was about my opinions, but they have to get to know me sooner or later. I just wasn't afraid to speak up when I wanted to.

6) I had participated in a health fair, and that was an experience. Free Massage Samples... Hmm... Let's just say I don't want to be doing that again anytime soon.

7) I did my laundry, finally. Now I need to put it away. I am always really bad at that part. I need to get better at it.

8) I am moving on with boys, and I am noticing the cute ones in my ward. I don't see the point in holding on when someone isn't interested in the fact you haven't tried to contact them in over a month. So... On to someone more deserving. And I will tell you, one boy in my ward is... OH MAN!! So cute! :D

That's about all for now. I am working on getting a scrapbook kit up that I designed, called Tre's Chic! So look for that in the next few days on Sunshiny Daze Designs.

I am a designer!

Hey everyone, I am going to ask you all a huge favor.

Tonight I am going to be putting up a link for a digital scrapbook kit that I had help design. Please go to my other blog, and get it if you want it. I have worked very hard on it. Please please PLEASE!!

Thanks, love and hugs. I have to go to set up my room for my next massage... But here is the link for my design blog!

Sunshiny Daze Designs

So it's done!

I am officially licensed for the City. I have my license being mailed to my house, and then I can start going Full Time at my job! Horray! I still have to talk to my boss and hammer out schedules and when it's all going to start taking off.

Just had to share my good news! Will share more when more comes up!

SO exhasted.

So I feel like I just ran a marathon for 3 days straight. I Had to work Friday, Saturday, and Sunday at the Spa. We were running our Valentines Package, and it was a ZOO!! I had 7 massages on Friday, 5 Saturday, and 7 on Sunday, plus getting robes, food, and escorting people to where they need to be. Something the MANAGER should have been doing.... But we will touch on that later.

I know, you are probably thinking "What's so tiring about massages?" Well, nothing unless you are the one giving them. And think about this for a minute... They weren't all just soft, Swedish massages. I had to do Deep Tissue, I had to do Stone, Aromatherapy, Medley (which mixes all of them together) and I had to do Trigger Point Therapy, with some Acupressure mixed in. I know, that's all Greek. But just think about being a Disneyland, where all you do is walk around. You can't sit down, can't take a break, don't have time to eat, and you can't get a drink of water because there is too much to do. And when you DO get a break, it's for maybe 5 minutes while someone does something you need them to do before you take them where they need to be. So you drink as much as you can, eat what you can, and run again.

My arms feel like they should be rubber. My legs and lower back are screaming at me each time I try to move. The BEST part about the whole thing was the chair I used for the feet massage and the neck. It wouldn't adjust, so it was all the way up extended for the seat, and when you sit on it, it sinks down so you are all the way at the bottom where it is for SHORT people. So, you have to use your quads and hamstrings to stop it from sinking so fast it pops and makes your client wonder what you are going to use to beat them with... (Kidding. I only beat a client in Deep Tissue, and that's with Elbows.... THEY LOVE IT!) as you are trying to be relaxing and not too stressed with the massage.

So I just stood up, ya... Don't know if I will be doing a lot of that today. But for some reason, I need to go out and get some bills paid before the craziness that is this job takes over again. Serious cricks in the neck and shoulders... Sounds like this massage Therapist can use a massage.

So when you are getting upset, thinking everything is just too hard, just think of this.... You could be me this weekend. Nightmare doesn't begin to describe what it was. But my checkbook is grateful for the work. Just please, let's not cram 2 weeks worth of work into 3 days again.

So excited!

So many good things are happening to my friends that I am so happy for them. Two friends of mine who have been together for a while as friends just got engaged, and it's about time!! They seriously didn't surprise anyone but it was just good to know that this happened for them.

But I am ALSO SO EXCITED because my sister has gotten me into Digital Candy, and I am now a digital scrapbook designer. I will have a new blog for it, and it won't be linked to my personal blog for obvious reasons, but I will allow you to access it from here. I even have a designer name!

Sunshiny Daze Designs

Isn't that just PERFECT!?!? Since everyone in Utah knew me as Sunshine for about 7 years, it seemed natural for that to be the name. And I put everyone in a daze... Laughs. Maybe not everyone....

But my sister being the absolutely WONDERFUL woman and designer that she is also made me a logo and everything! Check it out!!!!

I am SO giddy! It's SO Cute!!! She sat down and designed this for me last night, and this all has come together so quickly I am still kind of amazed by it! BUT.... You will need to check in a few days because my part will be posted, it will be a freebie. And I will be designing... How nuts is that?!? I am going to be a designer! Not that I plan to be a good one like my sister is for a while, but it still is a step in the right direction.

SO... If anyone has any ideas for what they would like in a Scrapbook kit, PLEASE let me know. I am still trying to figure out what to do to finish the one I am working on. But please let me know if you want something made, have any ideas, or anything. I am SO excited. Everything seems to be coming together pretty quickly and smoothly.

I HAVE A HOBBY!! YAY!!! Laughs. I am going to go so I can finish my kit, but I had to share my excitement! Look for my blog in a few days, gotta get some stuff decided... Like what to do for the background, and to get some pages designed with my elements and stuff... It is still blowing my mind. Wow. My sister is amazing to help me with this.

Valentines day

With Valentines Day coming closer and closer, it really makes me stop and think about what I have and don't have in my life. I have a wonderful family whom I love and adore. I have wonderful friends who make my life better by being a part of it.

I can sit here and mope and complain about how there is no one special in my life, and about how much Valentines Day makes me realize just how single I am. Trust me, I SO could do that. I have done that for about 7 years as I lived in Utah, but that was because I was truly alone.

I didn't have my family around, my friends would all have dates, and I would have to spend the day as a scrooge. I absolutely HATED Valentines day. I would boycott it and watch movies where one or both of the people in it died and there wasn't a happy ending. And I would LAUGH at them. I was really bad! I called it the Singles Awareness Day because it made me aware JUST how single I was.

The last year was bad because one of my best friends (whom I was living with at the time) had just broken up with her fiance like 5 days before Valentines Day. Then, 3 days later, she was dating someone else. He brought her cards proclaiming love for her, flowers, chocolate covered strawberries, and would be all lovey dovey mushy gross, after knowing her for 2 days!!! 2 DAYS!!!! COME ON!!! I don't personally think that's enough time to get to know someone, you need more than that to know if you truly love them or just lust them.... But that's not the point.
It was very hard for me, seeing what I wanted so badly and not having it.

So I ran away. Literally. I went to a friends house, and didn't come home until they were gone. I left before they got back and went to someone elses house and spent the night there. I had a night planned to watch movies with my friend, have sparkling cider and toast being single. That didn't work out, so I did it by myself. (I am not telling you this for you to feel sorry for me, I am just explaining part of why I hated the holiday so much.) I had to endure the kissing in the kitchen, being trapped in the bedroom because it was more of a studio layout, but there was a separate kitchen, bathroom, living room, and bedroom. It was just one straight shot, and you couldn't get out of there unless you were in the living room.

So when she got married to him 6 weeks later, it was a shock. But it made her happy, and it allowed me to not worry so much for her. But by that time, I was completely done with all of it. The whole Valentines stuff was wasted on me. I don't like it at all, and that completely cemented it for me.

I watched my friend whom was single for 3 days before guys were banging down her door to date her. She has been through 3 other engagements before she eloped with her husband. She finally found the right one, and I am happy for her.

It's just hard for someone when they have had no serious relationships to watch someone throw them away and pick up another one like I would pick up a movie at the video store. It makes you sit and wonder what it is about you that kept you single for so long, and is keeping you single.
It makes you question if it is something physical you are doing, like you are not pretty enough, or if it is just your size, which you have struggled with loving your whole life and can't seem to get down.

It seemed like about the time I loved myself, really truly loved myself, I had to go through this whole fiasco. I was glad to be single at the time, I was grateful to have time for myself, and not have to worry about what someone else was doing. And then everything I wanted SO desperately was shoved in my face and I could see it but I couldn't have it.

So I am grateful this Valentines day to be living with my sister and her family. While I may be single, I will not be alone. I have 3 little kids whom I love and I know love me in return. I have a sister and brother-in-law whom are wonderful. I have my mother, father, and brothers here. While I may not have a huge circle of friends, I do have loyal friends. That's what matters to me. While some friends may be states away, they are close in my heart.

Valentines Day can come, I don't care. I get to work all day, and come home and enjoy what it should be all about. Unconditional love. And I don't need a boyfriend for that right now. I have my family. That makes me content. (But if you know anyone whom is looking..... Hook a sister up!!! :D)

25 random facts about me.

1. I can listen to a song about 4 times and have it memorized, if I listen to the lyrics. It's really annoying, because sometimes I hear a song ONCE and if I REALLY don't want to have it memorized, it is in my head for good.

2. I hate to move. I have moved a lot, and I absolutely hate it.

3. I am terrified of falling from Heights. I won't go up ladders, I won't stand too close to the edge of anything.

4. I have an overactive imagination that drives me crazy. I can't go out to the car at night without worrying about something getting me.

5. I would LOVE to have a family of my own, despite living with 3 kids under 5. My sister is a angel to let me move in with her.

6. I have to eat candy in 2's. Like skittles, M&M's, etc.

7. I hate raisins!!!

8. I don't like to drive. At all. I am terrified of getting into an accident.

9. I don't pay full price for anything. I will ONLY buy it on sale.

10. I absolutely love Teen Pop music. You don't really have to worry about the lyrics, they don't curse.

11. I am very shy lately. I push myself to be extroverted all the time and it's driving me bonkers.

12. I almost served a mission for my church, the papers were returned. It was difficult, but it was important.

13. I am a severe pyromaniac. I absolutely am hypnotized by fire, but I would never set them.

14. I absolutely love flowers. Almost all types. Roses are my favorite, then Gardenias, daisies of ALL Types, and daffodils.

15. I am allergic to a ton of stuff. Medications, Echinacia, Golden Root, even Grass when it's fresh cut and clay mud.

16. I absolutely love to watch Music Videos. I need to see the story behind the song or I don't like the song.

17. I don't like to sing where people can hear me. I try to sing quietly in Church.

18. I am addicted to movies.

19. I absolutely LOVE the stars. My dream date is stargazing, in the summer, where it's completely dark around so you can see for miles and miles with a blanket to lay on and wonderful conversation.

20. I have never traveled outside the United States.

21. I have only traveled through 9 states that I can remember.

22. I am really thoughtful, so if I don't speak up when someone asks a question it's because I am contemplating it. By the time that they move on, I have an answer for the question but stay quiet because they have moved on.

23. I have a hard time not trusting people when I first meet them, so if I seem a little stand-offish it's because I have to be careful and feel out if I should trust them or not. I trust people too quickly, and that is both a good thing and a bad thing.

24. I love to read.

25. I remember the theme songs, and the names of the villains of the good cartoons from when I was growing up. Darkwing Duck, Tale Spin, Chip N Dale Rescue Rangers, the ones you ran home from school and were SO excited to watch. Remember TGIF? And Disney's Afternoon cartoons on regular TV?

I Hate money

I hate it with a passion. I have been putting off licensing for the state of California because of money. It costs almost as much as a car payment to get everything done, and my boss came to me tonight and said that she didn't know how much longer I can work with my spa until I get the licensing done. A lot of the people that work with the city are getting e-mails for our special on Valentines day, and since I don't have the license yet it is going to cause some problems. So what do you do?

You pound the pavement, looking for ANY opportunity to raise money so you can make the amount needed to get the stupid licensing done. It's going to be in total about 215 dollars. On top of this, she also said that she wants to bring me on FULL TIME. I am only working ON CALL right now, so that would be a HUGE improvement. I can't let that go. So I have to do anything to get some money.

Please pray for me. I have one client confirmed for tomorrow, so that helps. Just pray for me. VERY hard. Please pray for me.

Epiphany

I was driving home from Volleyball last night, listening to my music and a song came on that I totally understood how she felt when she wrote it. She is screaming to be heard, wanting someone to hold her. She's tired of being alone, and she's tired of not having someone in her life, so she is crying out for someone to come and rescue her from being single.

I have been in that place. I have been where I have been screaming inside for someone to rescue me from being single. I have been where I feel like just another face in the crowd. I have been where it seems like I am just begging for someone to be there, and feeling like no one is.

And that's when I realized JUST how grateful I am for this gospel. It doesn't matter how alone I feel, or how loudly I feel like I am screaming. I am NEVER alone in the crowd. I am never someone who has nobody there. While I physically am not able to get a hug from Heavenly Father, I can feel his love for me. I know that he is there for me. I also know that my family is there for me, and I love that.

I never have to worry about not having someone in my life. I have had moments where I was so physically alone that I was crying in my apartment. I asked Heavenly Father to help me, and the tears stopped, and I felt peace and love. I have had it happen so many times where I felt protected and loved that I wonder how people are able to go through their lives without knowing that the Lord is personally aware of what we go through, and loves us. He protects us when he can. He is happy for us, and sad when we hurt.

When we make decisions, he allows us the consequences. Good or bad, we have to accept the consequences for what we did, and that never changes. To have this knowledge made me very blessed, and very grateful.

I love the Gospel, I am grateful to be a member of the Church Of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints and hope that I am able to share that love with other people.

While I may understand where the artist was when she wrote her song, I couldn't help but feel sad for her and her lonliness. The Lord is out there, he is waiting for us to come to him. He has his hands out, waiting for us to take them. I am grateful for the opportunity to not have that sorrow in my life, and am anxiously awaiting the time where I have a true love of my own.

Catching Up

Things have been so crazy lately, I feel like I have some Catching up to do. So, here is a start. I am sitting at my sisters computer, thinking about all that has happened and realizing some pretty important things. For Example:

If someone REALLY is interested in you than they return phone calls, or at least are semi-interested in talking to you. If someone finds excuses to get off the phone and not do things with you, odds are that they are not interested.

If you feel that this is where you belong, you don't question it. It may be that you are just too stubborn for your own good, and while you have been banged over the head and KNOW that this is right to be here, you keep asking. So it's time to stop asking and start moving.

If you get bored, you are doing something wrong. It is especially true if you are bored doing the same things you have done for the last 6 months and nothing you do helps it. You need to get moving again, and start doing more.

More to come, better help with some kids.... Or at least look like I'm helping.